So glad you did this article today, Lily. I'm in the middle of an essay on The State of Communities, with particular emphasis on the characteristics of the population one chooses to serve. I'd love to walk further with your story and find out how you answered the questions you included in your article. Would you be open to some email exchange with me to focus specifically on your story?
Thank you very much for your wonderful comment, Georgia. Greatly appreciated. Your essay sounds most interesting. Would love to have an email exchange. I'll DM you.
Lovely points especially about looking for what we want in community. In so many efforts for inclusion, there's an exclusionary tension even among our people when the vibe isn't right. And as a friend of mine likes to remind me, "everyone has eyelids" and discerning our agency and what feels in alignment can be extra confusing as we toddle through arriving at new levels of awareness. Being able to recognize not every group is for us, just because we're gifted doesn't mean we all want the same things. I know for myself I need lots of different spaces, just like I need lots of different friendships. My serious and intellectual friends have a place as do my sillier playful ones, my sensitive and existentially attuned, etc etc. Knowing what I need helps me reach out with reasonable expectations instead of how my younger self had an unspoken expectation that all my friends would be all things all the time or stay a certain way... Ah more to muse on there, but thanks for articulating this so well and popping in the references/resources 🙏🏼 Appreciate your work so much!
Thanks Bee for this wonderful comment! Great points. Self-awareness strikes me as crucial, especially when entering communities. As you say, there's much diversity in gifted communities and this can come as a bit of a surprise. Horses for courses:) Needs can be met in a variety of ways, as you so pertinently describe. Having clear expectations for self and others participating in groups can also help. Appreciate you so much! Thanks again xxx
Wow… thank you deeply for articulating so thoroughly the elements of belonging and community through the lens of neurodivergent giftedness. It’s a topic I’ve been actively attempting to navigate for more than a few years now. I’m developing a framework in which connection is recognized as a core foundational element for human survival and health. And for those of us whose very essence varies broadly from so-called “norms,” finding communities that see and hear us is highly critical precisely because they are not obviously abundant.
There have been times in my life (more frequent as of late) in which I’ve felt compelled to exclaim, “I’m not of this earth.” I “know” this is not true, yet the part of my awareness and consciousness that “feels” does not always connect with and affirm such belonging so easily. What you communicate here (and elsewhere) is a helpful component of that “feeling” knowledge. Thank you so much. I know I’m not alone in my gratitude for your work.
This is wonderful to hear, thank you very much for taking the time to comment, Eric. So true that connection is a fundamental core element for our survival and health. To be seen and heard is crucial, even more so for neurodivergent outliers. I've gained a lot by engaging with gifted communities, learning a great deal about myself and others in the process. It's been life changing. Invaluable. I've often felt like I'm not of this time and it's been through deeply exploring Myers-Briggs that I've found others who feel the same way. Wondering if you've come across the work of Renaud Contini (YouTube) and his book on the INFJ. I wonder if this resonates with you: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AYTv8xoB5_g I've enjoyed the books Ren has written. He goes much deeper than anyone else I've come across, putting some puzzle pieces in place. Looking forward to reading your work. Many thanks again for connecting!
Wow. I've never seen this articulated in this way, and those questions.... They are--all of this is--so valuable. I identify as introverted and gifted. I'm learning that these identities can be considered neurodivergent. That's new to me. Thank you for giving us more information and support.
So glad you've found this post supportive. That's wonderful to hear. Thank you very much for your great comment. Your exploration of introversion, giftedness and neurodivergence is so exciting. All the very best!
So glad you did this article today, Lily. I'm in the middle of an essay on The State of Communities, with particular emphasis on the characteristics of the population one chooses to serve. I'd love to walk further with your story and find out how you answered the questions you included in your article. Would you be open to some email exchange with me to focus specifically on your story?
Thank you very much for your wonderful comment, Georgia. Greatly appreciated. Your essay sounds most interesting. Would love to have an email exchange. I'll DM you.
Lovely points especially about looking for what we want in community. In so many efforts for inclusion, there's an exclusionary tension even among our people when the vibe isn't right. And as a friend of mine likes to remind me, "everyone has eyelids" and discerning our agency and what feels in alignment can be extra confusing as we toddle through arriving at new levels of awareness. Being able to recognize not every group is for us, just because we're gifted doesn't mean we all want the same things. I know for myself I need lots of different spaces, just like I need lots of different friendships. My serious and intellectual friends have a place as do my sillier playful ones, my sensitive and existentially attuned, etc etc. Knowing what I need helps me reach out with reasonable expectations instead of how my younger self had an unspoken expectation that all my friends would be all things all the time or stay a certain way... Ah more to muse on there, but thanks for articulating this so well and popping in the references/resources 🙏🏼 Appreciate your work so much!
Thanks Bee for this wonderful comment! Great points. Self-awareness strikes me as crucial, especially when entering communities. As you say, there's much diversity in gifted communities and this can come as a bit of a surprise. Horses for courses:) Needs can be met in a variety of ways, as you so pertinently describe. Having clear expectations for self and others participating in groups can also help. Appreciate you so much! Thanks again xxx
I'm so glad I met you through community, Lil. ❤️
Awww that’s so kind Robin🙏 I’m so glad too, my dear friend🧡
Wow… thank you deeply for articulating so thoroughly the elements of belonging and community through the lens of neurodivergent giftedness. It’s a topic I’ve been actively attempting to navigate for more than a few years now. I’m developing a framework in which connection is recognized as a core foundational element for human survival and health. And for those of us whose very essence varies broadly from so-called “norms,” finding communities that see and hear us is highly critical precisely because they are not obviously abundant.
There have been times in my life (more frequent as of late) in which I’ve felt compelled to exclaim, “I’m not of this earth.” I “know” this is not true, yet the part of my awareness and consciousness that “feels” does not always connect with and affirm such belonging so easily. What you communicate here (and elsewhere) is a helpful component of that “feeling” knowledge. Thank you so much. I know I’m not alone in my gratitude for your work.
This is wonderful to hear, thank you very much for taking the time to comment, Eric. So true that connection is a fundamental core element for our survival and health. To be seen and heard is crucial, even more so for neurodivergent outliers. I've gained a lot by engaging with gifted communities, learning a great deal about myself and others in the process. It's been life changing. Invaluable. I've often felt like I'm not of this time and it's been through deeply exploring Myers-Briggs that I've found others who feel the same way. Wondering if you've come across the work of Renaud Contini (YouTube) and his book on the INFJ. I wonder if this resonates with you: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AYTv8xoB5_g I've enjoyed the books Ren has written. He goes much deeper than anyone else I've come across, putting some puzzle pieces in place. Looking forward to reading your work. Many thanks again for connecting!
Wow. I've never seen this articulated in this way, and those questions.... They are--all of this is--so valuable. I identify as introverted and gifted. I'm learning that these identities can be considered neurodivergent. That's new to me. Thank you for giving us more information and support.
So glad you've found this post supportive. That's wonderful to hear. Thank you very much for your great comment. Your exploration of introversion, giftedness and neurodivergence is so exciting. All the very best!